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SteveL
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PostSubject: Poking fun at religion   Tue Nov 01, 2011 1:37 pm



Last edited by SteveL on Tue Nov 01, 2011 1:39 pm; edited 1 time in total
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PostSubject: Re: Poking fun at religion   Tue Nov 01, 2011 1:38 pm

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PostSubject: Re: Poking fun at religion   Tue Nov 01, 2011 1:38 pm

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PostSubject: Re: Poking fun at religion   Tue Nov 01, 2011 1:39 pm

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PostSubject: Genuine biblical quotation   Wed Nov 02, 2011 2:04 pm

10 When you march up to attack a city, make its people an offer of peace. 11 If they accept and open their gates, all the people in it shall be subject to forced labor and shall work for you. 12 If they refuse to make peace and they engage you in battle, lay siege to that city. 13 When the LORD your God delivers it into your hand, put to the sword all the men in it. 14 As for the women, the children, the livestock and everything else in the city, you may take these as plunder for yourselves. And you may use the plunder the LORD your God gives you from your enemies.
--Deuteronomy 20:10-14

So the massacre of the inhabitants of Jerusalem by the Crusaders in 1099 apparently wasn't a deviation from biblical teaching after all.
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kubera

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PostSubject: Re: Poking fun at religion   Wed Nov 02, 2011 2:52 pm

Scorched earth genocide

This is what the Lord Almighty says... ‘Now go and strike Amalek and devote
to destruction all that they have. Do not spare them, but kill both man and
woman, child and infant, ox and sheep, camel and donkey.’” (1 Samuel 15:3)


not only is slavery allowed, slaves must be respectful

“Slaves, submit yourselves to your masters with all respect,
not only to the good and gentle but also to the cruel.” (1 Peter 2:18)


More genocide but save the virgin girls, they're hot...

15 “Have you allowed all the women to live?” he asked them. 16
“They were the ones who followed Balaam’s advice and enticed the
Israelites to be unfaithful to the LORD in the Peor incident, so that a
plague struck the LORD’s people. 17 Now kill all the boys. And kill every woman who has slept with a man, 18 but save for yourselves every girl who has never slept with a man.

God promotes being a sore loser

In Judges 14:11-19,
Samson loses a bet for 30 sets of clothes. The spirit of God comes upon
him and he kills 30 men to steal their clothes and pay off the debt.


Incest is required
18. God kills a man for not impregnating his brother’s widow.
In Genesis 38:9-10, God kills a man for refusing to impregnate his brother’s widow.

Now someone explain that whole god is good shtick????
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PostSubject: Re: Poking fun at religion   Wed Nov 02, 2011 3:12 pm

kubera wrote:
Incest is required
18. God kills a man for not impregnating his brother’s widow.
In Genesis 38:9-10, God kills a man for refusing to impregnate his brother’s widow.
Odd, because one of Henry VIII's arguments for invalidating his first marriage was that she was his brother's widow.
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PostSubject: Re: Poking fun at religion   Wed Nov 02, 2011 3:16 pm

kubera wrote:
Now someone explain that whole god is good shtick????
I believe I have cracked all the counterarguments offered by religious apologists to the problem of evil.
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PostSubject: Re: Poking fun at religion   Sun Dec 04, 2011 5:10 pm

Jesus appears on a dog's butt:

http://memebase.com/2011/11/07/internet-memes-holy-crap/

"Bow-wow before me."

The beauty of symmetry: God is dog spelled backwards, and the image is on the canine's back-end.
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