Humour in Dragon magazine

From the April 1985 issue (#96) of Dragon:

"The Meanest of Monsters" describes the Killer Dungeon Master and the Sleep-Inducing Dungeon Master.

Excerpt:

Quote :

Subduing a Dungeon Master: An attack on a Dungeon Master may be made to subdue rather than to hospitalize. . . . A maximum of six human-sized attackers per Dungeon Master is possible. . . .

Example of subduing a Dungeon Master: Two 8th-level fighters, a 7th-level dwarven fighter, an elven 4th-level fighter/6th-level magic-user, and a halfling thief of 9th level stumble upon an unarmed, wounded orc with no armor. Thinking the orc will be an easy hit, the group approaches. Suddenly the orc pulls out a ray gun and disintegrates the entire adventuring party.

"I've been playing that thief for three years!" yells Ken, slamming his fists on the table. Greg, not the type to be outdone, flips the table over and all the dice go with it. Sensing the group's possible displeasure, the Killer Dungeon Master attempts to flee while Mike hurls his copies of the Players Handbook and Monster Manual; the Players Handbook hits. Pat starts throwing empty drink cans, and Nick tackles the Killer Dungeon Master as he reaches the door. . . .